Hello dear friends!
I had a long break from any online presence, but now I am back.
I won’t hide the fact that I was fighting with stigma.
I was fighting with myself.
You see, I don’t really believe in my diagnosis.
They got it wrong. If they had to deliver anything (the psychiatrists), then it should be, at least, the right one (diagnosis). The Schizophrenia.
I am there, definitely. In that domain.
I see things, I hear, I remember my past lives, I believe in magic.
But because the psychiatrists decided that I was too high-functioning for it, they settled for bipolar. Which does say a lot, in my opinion, about the psychiatry.
Having emerged from my isolation, I am enjoying my life. I work (I teach almost full-time now). I write. I look after my son. I date. I go out. I have my friends, my cat, my house.
I have a nice life, and only because I don’t believe in mental illness and psychiatric diagnoses.
I started to make also Youtube videos about my ‘bipolar’ disorder, and recently I visited the psychiatric hospital where I was a patient, as trespasser. I got in, had a cup of coffee in the garden on the ward, and then walked away. They have a green room there, you see, as some sort of attempt at oasis in the middle of hell. Provided you go there, you can get some creams, left over by the staff members who got tired of using them themselves. There is also a broken guitar, and some cushions.
No one really goes there.
You can watch my visit to the hospital in here: My channel
One needs to fight the stigma and especially the burden of one’s diagnosis.
Once one discards the monstrosity of diagnosis, and glances what is behind, then and only then the recovery can start, when one embraces one’s madness, and the joy of Hearing and Seeing things in a reality which is true, magical and very real.
I got there, and I wish you the same!
As Nietzsche once said: ‘To be normal is the ideal of the unsuccessful’.
I am happy, I am fulfilled, and I am healthy. I look at madness as a gift, a gift from God, and a gift of magic.
See you later alligators:)